Terror Trails

Well, October is finally here! The nights are comfortably chilly, and the haunted houses are officially open for business. I must admit that getting a good adrenaline rush from people popping out the darkness is one of my guilty pleasures. I've been needing a good scare, so last night I returned to my haunted house roots and went to Terror Trails in Yantis, Texas near Lake Fork. Technically, it is not a haunted house but a 1/2 mile trek through the extremely dark backwoods of East Texas.

I've been to Terror Trails several times before, but this time around I had three Terror Trails virgins (Megan, Katelyn and Camilo) tag along. When we reached our destination, they were all pretty skittish and trying to decide who was going to be upfront and who was going to be in the back. Me, being the noble one, decided to take up the front position and to be Megan's "Pillar of Strength". In other words, I allowed her to squeeze the circulation out of my right arm and place her face into my back when we had had to walk through the several tightly enclosed spaces.

Last night, of all nights, was the best night to go to Terror Trails who is celebrating its 13th year of operation this year. Since it was a Friday everyone was at a football game. So we literally managed to "hit the trail" within five minutes. In the past years, I've waited in line for almost an hour. It's usually worth the wait, and last night was no exception.

I pretty much knew what to expect, but the rest of the crew was about as nervous as a virgin at a prison rodeo (that's pretty nervous). Tensions were high as we walked into "The Black Room". Katelyn and Camilo were pressed up pretty tightly against me and Megan, and they had the general fear that we were going to run off and leave them.

"Sorry if I choke you, Chance," Katelyn said as she clung to the hood of my jacket.

We reassured them over and over again that we would try our best not to, but it's every man for himself. Just kidding! Well...maybe not. There was series of incidents shared between all of us that showed what might happen if we were stuck in a "scary movie situation". My companion Megan sacrificed me to a big bat, or pushed me into it to be more precise. Later on, while we were running from a chainsaw wielding maniac, I dragged Megan through a semi-maze like building and made her face smack up against a wall...I did not stop. Yes folks, that would be the same infamous wall that broke my glasses many moons ago. As for Katelyn and Camilo, they fought over who would form the rear when we walked into the several buildings, but they made up when Katelyn tumbled (chainsaw maniac scenario again) and Camilo stayed behind to encourage her to get up. And that folks, would be murder victims two and three (since I was already eaten by a man-sized bat). The question is, would Megan have made it out alive? I don't think so. She would most likely be the last one left, but murdered she would be (after being punched in the back by Camilo). How? Most likely by some troll hiding underneath a bridge.

At the end, I realized I left out a very important rule aside from mentioning anyone's names (they will call you by name if they know it)... don't run or otherwise they will just chase you farther. I remembered this rule as the entire group tried to catch its breath.

"God, this place needs a bench," Katelyn said as we stumbled away breathlessly from the first chainsaw.

All in all, scary and mindless fun was achieved. Afterwards we all went to one of the friendliest places in Sulphur Springs...Whataburger.

And now for some blurbs from last nights spooky adventure...

"Do we have to walk through there? Can't we just walk around?" - Megan
"I've got a great idea, why don't we just turn around and go the opposite direction?" - Katelyn

"Was he spitting on us, or using a water bottle?" - Megan
"The water was dripping from the ceiling." - Chance
"That's even worse." - Katelyn

"Oh my God, is that a bridge? Is that a bridge!?!" - Megan
"No, that's a building." - Chance

"Those buildings weren't designed with fat people in mind." - Camilo

"I'm too out of breath to scream. I can only grunt." - Katelyn

"There's somebody in there...there's somebody in there. Don't push me!" - Chance

"Would someone please stop stepping on the back of my shoes?" - Chance


Photo courtesy of Google